Easter

This is an anti-Easter rant. It's not religious, so don't go getting all offended just yet. It's not about money or the monetization of the holy holiday, so all you capitalists can sit down. My specific hatred of this season is around Easter Eggs. Yes. All those little eggs that we gobble down on Easter morning and then sugar buzz the rest of the day through.

My initial problem with them comes from the chocolate they make them from. It's not good chocolate. In fact it generally tastes like sand. Companies that make chocolate KNOW that you are not buying an Easter egg because it is made with great chocolate, you're buying it because its in the shape of an EGG. So there's no point in making it with their premium chocolate, you don't care about quality, you care about the egg shape. Further proof of this is the "cracked egg" look that so many chocolate eggs have nowdays, WTF? Why are the eggs cracked? It's because its more eye-catching and aesthetically pleasing, because the first company to do this saw an uptic in sales when they did, much more so than when they put the really good quality chocolate in it.

Ohhh, but Derek, I hear you say, it's because you aren't buying the right type of chocolate Easter Eggs. You need to buy brand X. Sod off with you and your brand X. Lindt make great chocolate, but they still won't put their BEST chocolate in their eggs because they know they don't need to. They'll put their lower grade chocolate in, charge the same if not more, and people will buy them anyway.

My second problem with Easter Eggs is the air. I generally don't like to pay for air, I believe that's something that should always be free. However, this is not the truth for Easter Eggs, they're MOSTLY air, and they're charging you more for the air and the crappy chocolate in the shape of an egg. It's just plain wrong.