My Incomprehensible Aussie Accent

I've had two experiences with my accent drawing bemused stares from shop assistants, so I thought I would write about them here. Funnily enough, most people think I have a very slight accent, and I've frequently been mistaken for American, British and Kiwi. Yet, this sort of exchange still happens:

Me: "I'd like to buy a desk." (standing in the furniture section)
Shop Assistant: "A disk? Erm. I think we have some up front..."
Me: "No, no, a computer desk." (Then, realizing my elaboration would not help) "A desk you would put a computer on."
Shop Assistant: "A disc you would put a computer on...?"
Me: (In frustration) "ONE OF THESE! A DESK!"
Shop Assistant: "Oh! Yeah we sell them."

And yet another classic exchange, this time at a bar:

Me: "I'd like a beer, thanks."
Bargirl: "A bear? Whassat?"
Me: "A beer. You know, BEER." (miming pulling a pint)
Bargirl: I'm not sure I know what that is."
Me: "A BEER! B for Barney, E for Eric, E for Eric, R for Robert!"
Bargirl: "What is it?"
Me: "It's....an alcholic beverage... that people drink at the end of the day..."
Bargirl: "I'll ask the manager what that is."
Me: "OK you go do that."
Bargirl: (After walking 3 paces to her manager, then coming back) "Do you mean a beer?"

Oh man, I hope I never have to communicate anything important to these people.

Giving up in style

This chap got hauled up by the FBI while returning to the USA. Once you're on the FBI hit list it's hard to get off, so he documented his life here.

From all the photos I've seen on the site, he's not in them, so I wonder if he's building up a body of work to prove where he is and what he's doing, and then hands his GPS device and camera to someone else while he goes and does something unspeakable? Kind of like a person who performs a few Ebay sales to get a good reputation, and then stings a bunch of customers? Hmmmm.....

So this blog is supposed to be about my time in Los Angeles. I think the best place to start is by looking at one of the main factors that dominate the LA landscape and define just about everything you do here : the freeway.

According to the Wikipedia, a freeway is "is a type of road designed for safer high-speed operation of motor vehicles through the elimination of at-grade intersections". I must admit, there have been times where I've been sitting in traffic for 20 minutes wondering which asshole decided to name these ways "free". There are times when they clearly should be called "Parking Lots".

They occasionally have transit lanes, designed for use with 2 or more people. However, they are also open to a new type of car: the hybrid. To me these should be something that is half car and half airplane, but what do I know. These you will see all over the place, it's incredible how popular they are. Rumour has it that Toyota is so impressed with thier current suite of Hybrids, that their entire product line will use the technology by 2010. We'll see.

But back to the transit lanes. I remember in Seattle they had transit lanes, and a phone number you can call if you see someone using one illegally. The phone number, easy to remember for when you get home, was something like 1-800-977-HERO. C'mon. If you dobb someone in for illegally using a transit lane, you're not a hero. SNITCH might be a better use. TRANSIT HERO, cleaning up the express lanes, one lawbreaker at a time. At least the Los Angeles County is not naive enough to think it's residents will turn on each other. Or are they?

Around my apartment

People have been asking me to post pictures of my place and the surrounds, so here are a few photos and vids of the area around my apartment. The amount of advertising is pretty amazing, and they keep coming up with new ways of making you take notice:



Here's a local Sushi place:



I don't know about you, but probably one of the least reassuring signs is "50% off Sushi". Maybe "50% of Hookers" is probably lower on the stakes. I haven't eaten here yet, for obvious reasons.

So some shots now of my apartment complex:



and the pool:



The inside of the apartment still looks like a bomb hit it (I know, we've been moved in for 3 weeks now, it still looks terrible), so I'll post some shots next week. However, here is a video of some of the local wildlife: